flowchart

box 1 - we're alive
right?
i mean, that's the starting point, because that's our certainty
and you have to look at life
and weigh it
and across every dimension its breathtaking
complxities of our bodies, development in the womb
at 8mm an embryo's heart is beating
you know, ecosystems, the balance
the perfect percentage of oxygen in the atmosphere to breath, but not cause spontaneous combustion
the axis of the planet, the distance friom the sun, the spin - day and night; work and rest
the complexity of the brain, human emotion, art, expression, love, significance
the meaning we demand for every single event before we agree to it
relationships, procreation
jump out to the galaxy being 100,000 light years across in diametre
sitting in the middle of a universe of hundreds of billions of other galaxies. the universe is beyond comprehension
i mean we could go all day. take any one thing and think for more than 5 minutes and you'll be floored.
death, and fear of death. our scrambling for being remembered, our inherent morality, systems of justice
the fact that there are 12,000,000,000,000,000,000 atoms in a grain of salt
the human eye, the concept of language
and even the things we feel that can't be expressed
i guess at the end of thinking (if there was an end) the first flow-chart box is "are we here by chance, is there no order or meaning to life, or is there a meaning, is there a purpose, a "god"?"
as a person who's alive in this life and reality and on this planet spinning in this universe, i can't not think that there has to be a god behind it all.
the big bang doesn't make sense of my reality. it tells me i'm an accident created by pre-existant, eternal atoms who bumped into each other and created this? i can't take that. and it tells me that everything i've ever felt comes to a total of 'nothing' and i can't believe that's true.

box 2 - ok, if there is a god. has it/he/she/they made contact with the world. are they knowable in any way. or is it/he/she/they a force out there not to be known?
and i suppose it's 50:50 to an extent
but if you take the world as it is and the people we are in the reality that is, then you consider that this was conceived and created by this 'god' then you've got to account for
1. that's a lot of effort, to then take no credit and remain an anonymous force. seems logical for there to be some impact remaining, some fingerprint or evidence of god
2. if you consider how intensely relational we are as people. that life is up when relationships are, and never more down than when relationships are breaking apart. how keenly we pursue love and companionship. how we worship it in all our art. how we long to be known and to know.
and if we're the creation of a 'god' it would make more sense that that 'god' be knowable. relational. relatable in some way. rather than not.
i lean towards realtional, because i have a box 3 and because of the above logical reasoning - 'logic' being another evidence for the first box)

box 3 is also somewhat logical
if god is knowable in some way - is it in one of the major (or minor) world religions (i.e. some people are onto the communication/understand-ability that 'god' has provided) or is it a 'communication' that no one has really grasped and organised and understood yet?
and i suppose i'd consider that if 'god' was making a universe that plays out like a rubick's cube times by a symphony orchestra to the power of an orgasm and then times infinity (in complexity, logic, beauty, feeling and experience) then i'd back it/him/her/them as able to communicate in a way that is understood by people - i.e. the god who made the world and 'communicated' to the world is probably one of the world-religion gods