sun or shade

do you know that feeling when you're lying in the sun and there are clouds moving overhead and it goes from full force sun to cool cloudy shade? and somewhere between the two it passes so slowly that you're not quite sure which it is. and at some moments you need to open your eyes to check whether you're feeling the full force of the sun on your skin or if it's cloudy. and without looking it can be hard to tell if you're lying in light or shade. and it's impossible to know (if it is cloudy) whether it's a small cloud covering you or a long stretch that means there will be no more sun for a while. there's something about my skin lying there blind that isn't accurate enough to know after a while. i think that's how i feel spiritually a lot of the time.